'Twas the night 'fore elections

'Twas the night 'fore elections and all on Facebook
passion, accusations, do I even dare look?
status: my absentee ballot was mailed out with care!
I'm hoping my guy will be in the oval's chair!

Lip dubs and satire and commands to go vote.
status: If my guy doesn't win, I'm on the next boat! (2 likes)
reply: Stop Shoving Your Religion Down My Throat! (12 likes)
reply: I Swear I'll Unfriend you after that shit you wrote! (1like)

Your candidate's a lier and a jackass know-nuthin'
Damn it, I'll show you! why isn't there a 'dislike' button?!
Nice normal people throughout the year,
turned wingnut and commie... I needed a beer.


Unfriending an uncle, I hit a new low
and decided to catch up on pre-recorded shows.
In comfy pajamas with braids on my head
I settled in to see the walking dead.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter
I paused DVR to see what was the matter
Obama with his ears and Mitt with his hair
were out on the porch, just standing there.

'Thank you for opening they door' they did greet
'You are just the one we came out here to meet!'
I knew then I was going to miss my show
for I was the last undecided
in Ohio.

"He'll tax you," hair called, "only if your rich!" said the ears
"I am," I said, and Mitt laughed thankful tears.
"But," I said, "Gays should be able to marry"
'oh' they both said and hair looked around wary.

For the last several months they showed their best sides
and took us along for baby-kissing rides.
And when something damaging dared rear its head
diversion and distraction helped put it to bed.


Quick! Hide Akin and Palin the GOP cried!
It's Kid Rock and Eastwood we want by his side!
And those donkeys, they did not miss a beat,
they hid Biden & Pelosi deep under the street.


Now tweeters, now mailers now knockers and callers
on radios on tvs on graphiti'd bathroom stall(ers)!
To the top of Wisconsin and the tips of the beach!
All old people and women I need you to reach!

Their supporters cheered out and passionately cried,
We'll beat down the other, we'll throw mud in their eye!
We'll get the word out! On us you should bet!
Think you've seen bad, you've seen nothing yet!

I looked at these two standing tall on my lawn
and asked if it would be worth it when the 7th saw dawn.
They looked at each other and shared so warm a glance
I'd swear I was witnessing a blossoming romance.

And then it hit me with such a force
that I screamed aloud, 'of course, of course!'
Worried, they broke their stare to woo me more,
but all they saw was the click of my door.

Back to my Facebook I ran with glee
to share the secret they accidentally shared with me.
Obama was in on it and Romney was too,
you see either way, they'll be better off than you!

While the runner up's supporters are crying the day of the loss
and winners will have to defend the failings of the new boss,
the candidates themselves will be dancing a jig
their egos inflated, their bank accounts big.

Mitt will be buying another show horse.
Obama will swing his big stick 'round the course.
The economy will get better, or maybe it chokes,
but sure as hell, they know, these two won't go broke.

So let's not belittle each other for them
and pretend that either's completely a gem.
Let's work, serve and vote the way Americans can
and look in the mirrors to make ourselves better women and men.

It's America's people, from new citizens to old
that have decided our freedom's more precious than gold.
It's awesome that we all have a voice we can share,
though passions may rise and tensions may flare.

So whoever wins, be it good guy or bad.
Be good sports if you win, and if you lose don't get mad.
And whether in joy or in pain you feel need to shed tears,
just remember, we get to do it all again in four years.

I was writing this down as I heard motors roar
and through the sky their private jets did soar.
But I heard them exclaim 'ere they flashed out of site,
There is still time to contribute to my campaign tonight!

Happy Election Day!

thanks for reading,

-m